When You Can't Find a Job That Works For You...

This is the problem I had for years, finding a job that worked for me. I had kids which meant that I needed a job where I was going to make enough money to make it worth my while to go to work. I needed a job with flexible hours because kids get sick and schools close for various reasons. I could only work when my kids were in school otherwise I would just be working to pay for childcare. With this criteria and my lack of college education, I didn't have too many options. So I decided to take the skills that I had from previous employment experience and work for myself. This is how I started my cleaning company.

I do not have a glamorous job by any means but it works for me. I set my own schedule and I take  off when I need to. I have been very lucky because I really have some great clients, they let me bring a kid to work when I need to or reschedule due to whatever life has thrown at me at that particular moment. They are just out right Awesome! Why do they do this? Well, because they love the service that I provide and I make their lives easier by doing what I do. They appreciate my hard work and the freedom I give them to do other things like spending time with their family.

My rates are reasonable but competitive, the one thing I have learned is that if I under bid a job then they question the quality of my service. After many conversations with myself over this, I decided to increase my rates. Now I'm not trying to get rich by cleaning houses but I charge a fair price for the service I provide and no one complains.

The start up cost was very minimal as I already cleaned my own house and pretty much had everything I needed. I advertised on the internet, friends and family spread the word as well. After I had enough clients that I was making a profit and could afford to, I got insurance for my business. I do all of my own "bookkeeping" and taxes myself so that I don't have those added expenses.

Now don't get me wrong, like any company I loose clients and things get rough. In my case it's usually right after the holidays and lasts until Spring. Then things pick back up and life gets really busy again, sometimes I have more work than I know what to do with since I work by myself. No matter what, I am very thankful for whatever clients I do have at any given moment because they help keep me out of the unemployment line.

I honestly never thought I would be a small business owner since I wanted to be a nurse ever since I was a child but things change and I had to work and that's how I got that "Job" that works for me.

I know that there are a lot of other people out there that have the same dilemma and I'm sure that those people have a marketable skill that they could use to their benefit just as I did. So if you're in that same boat I was in 6 years ago, take a look at what ever skills you may have and see how you can make them work for you.

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Divorce ~ You Divorce Your Spouse, Not Your Children

This is a topic that really makes my blood boil! Having been married and divorced not once but twice, I get the fact that sometimes relationships just don't workout. Sometimes divorce seems like the only good solution to the problem and so it goes. That's all well and good but what I feel is unexceptionable is when there are children involved and the non custodial parent thinks that they can just divorce the children along with the spouse.

Marriage isn't always easy and divorce can be even harder to deal with due to the feelings that arise with it. When you have children and choose to divorce, those children are still your children. No matter where you live, near or far. No matter how you feel about your "Ex", you still have an obligation to those children. You owe them the love and support that you would have provided had you stayed in a relationship with your "Ex". The children should not have to suffer due to the decisions that their parents made.

Being responsible is part of being an adult, you have to set aside your feelings, wants and needs and take care of your responsibilities to your child/children. For those who pay child support, that's all well and good but it can't stop there. You need to be there for them physically and emotionally. You need to support them through there struggles and there accomplishments. You need to let them know that they still matter, that you still love them no matter what. You still need to make memories with your children just as you would have had you not gotten divorced. Just because you live in a separate home doesn't mean that you can't take the kids fishing or go to the park with them. It doesn't mean that you shouldn't attend their dance recital or their school play. The children still need both parents to love and support them.

What happens when the non custodial has little or no interest or interaction with the children? I can tell you... The child becomes sad and depressed, they become angry, they have poor self esteem, their grades drop, they have trouble making and keeping friends. They are more likely to become another statistic with mental health issues because no matter what anyone tells them, they will always think there was something wrong with them that made the non custodial parent want nothing to do with them.

So your marriage may not be "Until death do us part" but your obligation to your children is!

This is just one of those post that I felt the need to write because I see this happen all to often.

As always, I would love to hear your thoughts on this topic. Leave a comment and stop by again.

When Schools Push the Healthy Eating and Fitness Topic...Are They Doing More Harm Than Good?

Now don't get me wrong, I'm all about raising "Healthy Kids" and I understand that we have many kids that are not at a "Healthy Weight". I think it's great to teach kids about healthy eating habits and encouraging them to be active instead of playing video and computer games. I also know that kids spend more day time hours at school than they do at home, therefore most of the "Healthy Habits" they are learning are coming from school.


Now my kids are all on the small side, my 10 year old son has yet to hit 60lbs and my 8 year old daughter actually weighs 60lbs. All of my kids eat three meals a day and several snacks as well, meals are healthy and snacks are healthy about 90% of the time. Just the other day my 4 year old asked for a snack and when I asked what he wanted he said "a fruit or a vegetable, because they are healthy for me". So now they are starting to teach this in Pre School because they want them to learn this at a young age so that as they get older they can make better choices about their eating habits. I get it!


I totally understand what the schools are trying to do but do they understand what they are really doing? 
I now have an 8 year old that weighs 60lbs that thinks she is fat and that her butt is too big. 
I also have a 4 year old that throws temper tantrums if we run out of green peppers because they are healthy for him. Although my daughter is bigger than her older brother, she is by no means "fat".


I feel that by pushing all of these "healthy habits" and focusing on size and weight at such a young age is just lighting the candle that will burn the house down so to speak. I can foresee many of these kids having issues like anxiety and depression, low self esteem and eating disorders as they grow older. I really don't think that they should be putting so much focus on something like a child's weight and their eating habits.


I mean I wonder if the school system really thinks that an 8 year old borrows her parents Lincoln Navigator on Saturday morning, picks up all of her girl friends and takes a trip to the produce isle at Giant. Wake up people, the parents do the shopping and the parents are the ones who let the kids play video games. I think if there is a change that needs to be made regarding a child health then that is the child's parents responsibility. I also believe that is the school systems job to provide our children with an education, not to have them stressing out over things that they can't control.


I'm sure that in the beginning, they thought this was a great idea to teach these healthy habits and encourage more exercise. Maybe they didn't think about what kind of negative impact this may have on a child's emotional health and those health issues are far harder to fix.


These are just my opinions based on my personal experiences and are not directed at any single person.


What are your thoughts on this topic?


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Have a great day!

The Balancing Act and What Works for Me

Life is busy no matter what but when your a parent it's a constant balancing act. Some couples do what I call the 50/50 split with the parenting and the every day household chores. For some of us that just isn't feasible, for instance when your other half leaves for work before 7am and doesn't get home until after midnight because his employer works him to death. That leaves the other party with more than a plate full! I myself have the kids, the household chores, the shopping, the school functions/meetings, the doctor, dentist and orthodontic appointments and I run my own business. So for me it is a constant balancing act and if you throw in a sick kid or a snow day then it's a full three ring circus.

 A run down of my day...

~5am my alarm goes off, I actually drag myself out of bed somewhere between 5am-6am. 

~COFFEE ~ I have to have coffee before anyone talks to me otherwise it's just not pretty. 

~Get the middle school kid out the door at 7:05am 

~Get the other 3 kids fed and dressed, take a shower, pack pre-school kids lunch, make sure everyone has everything they need for the day, load up the car and get the elementary kids on the bus at 8:35. 

~Drop 4 year old off at pre-school and get myself to work. 

~ I have to be off work by 2pm so that I can pick my 2 high school kids up at 2:30pm because they go to private school and don't have transportation. 

~ Get home at about 3:05pm, read mail and emails and breath for a few minutes before the elementary school kids come home at 4pm. 

~Cook dinner. 

~5-5:30pm Pick up pre-school kid from daycare. 

~5:30/5:45 Serve dinner. 

~Homework time & playtime for the kids otherwise as Crazy Hour which lasts until bedtime. 

~8:30 is bedtime for the younger kids and yes I do make my Middle school kid go to bed at this time because he gets up at 5am to make sure he has enough time to aggravate everyone in the house before he house to school. 

~9pm comes around and I'm ready to fall on my face. 

 So that's a quick run down of my day, but I still have chores to do... So what works for me is to get things done anywhere in my day that I have a few minutes. I always try to throw a load of laundry in to wash in the morning and if I remember, I throw it in the dryer before I leave the house. That time I have from 3:05-5pm...I sort the mail so that it doesn't become a mound on my desk. After I start dinner, I do a quick vacuuming (enough to get some of the dirt up off the floor). After the kids have all finished their homework, I try to do a quick pick up of all the things they have scattered around the house and I make everyone put their own belongings away. If they don't put their stuff away then I throw it in a basket and who knows when they will ever see it again. 

The high school kids are old enough to help so... The have dish night 3 night a week and I have dishes on Sundays. I have them watch the younger kids while I pick up my youngest from daycare. They generally wash their own laundry, however if I'm feeling especially nice and I have time then I'll do it for them but they have to fold it an put it away themselves. 

 The younger kids can do things to help out as well like setting the dinner table, feeding the dogs, cat & guinea pigs. They also put their own clean laundry away with the exception of my 4 year old. They can take out the trash and the recycling as well. No, the kids do not like to do any of these things but I make them do it because the less I have to do then the more time I have to spend with them watching movies, playing games and taking them out to do something fun. 

That's just daily maintenance, I do major cleaning on either Saturday or Sunday morning. Laundry is always a work in progress and whatever I wash that doesn't get folded and put away during the week will also get done on the weekend. These things usually take 3-4 hours but I get an early start so that I'm usually done by lunch time. Whatever morning I'm not doing the major clean is the morning that I do the grocery shopping. The kids will gladly help put the food away as they like to take inventory. 

Now things don't always go as planned and some days the floor is dirty and the laundry looks like Mount Everest but for the most part I'm keeping things together. The main thing is that the kids are healthy, clean, fed and no one has killed anyone. I figure as long as I've accomplished that much than I have few worries. 

So this is my Balancing Act and What Work for Me...How about you? How do you balance kids, work and all that goes along with it? 

 Leave a comment, Follow my Blog and come back again. Most of all... Enjoy Your Day!

Lazy Momma Dessert

I'm not Betty Crocker or June Cleaver but every now and then I like to make a dessert. Now this doesn't happen too often because I'm pretty busy with work, cleaning the house, doing laundry and making sure that my kids don't kill each other. Lets face it, my kids need sugar like I need a hole in my head! However, I on the other hand could use that extra boost so that I can make it until it's time to put the kids to bed. Not that I would be bouncing off the walls like my kids do or running around trying to shoot the cat with a Nerf gun but my eyes would look like they were open.

Since I don't have much time, I make a "Lazy Momma Dessert", cake that bakes while we eat dinner and I can serve it before they throw their plate in the sink. The kids like desserts like this which makes it a great bargaining tool to get them to eat the dinner that they don't like. Last night I made a Pumpkin Cake and it was so tasty that my picky eater even ate it.

Pumpkin Cake Recipe

1 Box Yellow cake mix
1 15oz can Pumpkin Pie Filling
3 Eggs
1/4 c. Butter (melted)

Mix all ingredients and spread in a greased 9x11 baking dish.
Bake for 25 minutes or until center is done.

Pudding :
1- 1oz box Vanilla pudding (I use instant)
Follow instructions on the box

When the cake is finished baking, remove from oven and poke holes in it.
Let cool for about 15 minutes
Spread pudding on top of cake and let set for about 10 minutes.
Then Top with 1- 8oz container of Cool Whip.
Cut & Serve

This is an easy recipe and it doesn't take too long to make it. However I have to say that it does taste better if you make it ahead of time and let it set in the refrigerator.

This method works with all cake mixes, puddings and pie fillings.

So if you want to make the kids think that you slaved over the stove to make them a special dessert (like the lady in the Rice Crispy Treat commercial), whip up a "Lazy Momma Cake" and don't forget to throw some flour all over yourself.

Enjoy your cake and stop by again!

I Think I Have Lost My Mind!

I had this great idea that I was going to start blogging, you know like all these other people are doing now. I did some research and I set up my blog site, I don’t even know if I uploaded the picture right or not because I’m not one of these tech savvy women. I had it all planned out, it was going to look really professional. Yeah right!

So here it is, that great blog I was going to start. I don’t think I have ever really finished anything that I’ve planned to do except maybe a few thousand loads of laundry. Sometimes those even sit long enough that I have to run them through the wash a second time because I got caught up doing something else and forgot about them. Thank god for Downy, that stuff really takes that three day old stinky water smell out of your clothes. Needless to say, this blog is going to be less than professional because I’m just not a professional…I’m a mom.

Speaking of being a mom… at this very moment I feel more like a Jack-elope, you know one of those rabbits with a horn sticking out of it’s head. Yup that would be me at 9pm after I finally got the last kid to bed. After one has screamed because he had to stop playing a computer game. After another kid decided he was now hungry and then decided to start calling his sister four letter words while eating his snack bar. Then the same kid decided he was going to refuse to finish eating the snack bar because he was reprimanded for calling his sister those four letter words that I clearly heard him say even with a mouth full of food. Then another kid decides it’s a great time to start dragging toys out all over the playroom that I spent and hour cleaning earlier this evening. I finally get everyone in their rooms and go to turn out the boys light just to find one of them standing there still dressed and wearing shoes. When I asked why he wasn’t ready for bed, he said that his pj’s were in laundry that I had washed and dried this evening. I said “well, go get them and put them on”. He said “I can’t because now they are too cold”. Are you freaking kidding me? It’s now 20 minutes after I told everyone to get in bed and the kid is telling me that his pj’s are too cold to wear. At that very moment I could almost see my head flying off my shoulders powered by the steam coming out of my ears. I was so irritated that I got the darn pj’s and put them on the heater to warm them up so that the kid who had come up with every excuse and had done everything he could think of could have some nice toasty pj’s to ear to bed. I can’t believe that it has come to this, the extent that I will go to just to get the kid to be quiet and go to bed. I know it sounds absolutely insane and as I sit here, I wonder what would some other kids parent have done. I mean who the heck actually does this crazy stuff? I bet he is laying there in bed in his nice warm pj’s thinking…Mom is a real freaking idiot! He is probably laughing too. Did I care if his pj’s were warm? No! But, I wanted quiet, you know the kind you only get when the kids are asleep. Tomorrow is a new day and I may be up for the fight. I may even decided to soak his pj’s in water and hang them on the clothes line (it’s currently 19 degrees out and not going to be much warmer tomorrow), then let him talk about them being too cold.  So did I loose my mind? Maybe, but I won the war because the kids are all in bed sleeping.

Well, I hope those of you that read this have had a good laugh. Welcome to my life, where there is never a dull moment and come visit again as I’m sure I’ll have another seemingly crazy story to tell. To all of the parents out there who are in the same boat, I hope you are able to enjoy those few moments of silence at the end of the day just as I am.